You know you’re from rural America when…

Note from Steve: I wrote these. I don't know if they're funny, but they're true.

1. You remember when your town got its first and only McDonald’s because it was less than 20 years ago.
2. Seeing Ford Pintos and Chevy Chevettes on the highway is still a common sight.
3. Wal-Mart is the biggest store in town.
4. “Git-R-Done” is more than a catchphrase; it’s a way of life.
5. The guy who played “Cooter” on “Dukes of Hazzard” once visited town, and people still talk about it fondly.
6. There are more new trucks than new cars on your local highways.
7. People still plant vegetable gardens and do home canning.
8. Your local downtown has antique stores, craft shops, and one hardware store left from the old days.
9. Local ‘high culture’ comes primarily from PBS.
10. Myrtle Beach, Pigeon Forge or Branson are vacation spots.
11. There’s at least one junk car on your property.
12. You tuck printed t-shirts into your jeans.
13. Everyone knows your favorite NASCAR driver because of the large magnet on your car.
14. The other magnet on your car is a Jesus fish, a yellow ribbon or Calvin pissing on something.
15. Free Hat Day at the farm supply store is a big deal.
16. Your local radio stations are primarily country music.
17. The cool kids at school dress like cowboys or rappers.
18. There is more than one brand of “honey bun” at your local store.
19. It takes more than 30 minutes to get to a mall.
20. You don't know anyone who drinks imported beer.
21. All your cousins live down the road from you.
22. You’ve gotten into a heated debate with someone over Ford vs. Chevy.
23. Two words: mall bangs.
24. Your cellphone is on a “holster” to your side.
25. There are more churches around than convenience stores.
26. You have a mullet.
27. School lets out the first day of deer hunting season.
28. Your grandma watches pro wrestling on TNT.
29. An FFA jacket is a status symbol.
30. You live in a double-wide.